Relationships or nah?


 I hate seeing people under the age of 18 in relationships because quite frankly you are too young. You say that you are in love, that they might be the one. Are you for real? You haven’t experienced anything yet. People be changing relationships every month and I just can’t comprehend why you would do that to yourself, knowing it won’t work out. Why are you prepared to give out your love and heart like that?

Honestly do not get into a serious relationship at age 16. This is the awkward stage where we change and we are developing still. Not only is it a major year academic wise it is a major year for your biology. You are still growing up. At age 16 things are vague, confusing and a blur. It is the phase where you finally feel old and yet you are still so young. It is when you start developing into an individual. An age where you discover more and more experiences to help you find yourself. The age where you start arguing with your parents because you want to do things completely different to what they want you to do. Like telling them that there is no chance of you becoming a doctor, engineer or lawyer for that matter. (unless of course you want to). It is the stage when you come out of the basic girl/boy zone and find your own style. You find you.

So tell me while all of this is going on do you want to be in a relationship? How can you spend ages loving another at this age? In the sense that you give all your love to another and then when it’s ended you can’t even pick yourself back up because you don’t love yourself. You relied so much on the other person that you are lost without them. You were attached to them. Then you’re stuck aren’t you. You have to start from square one. You can’t love someone else at age 16 because quite frankly it is the age you don’t even love yourself.  If you are constantly getting yourself into relationships, I’m sorry to break it to you darling but that’s all you will do. You will not know anything apart from to love another. Then, when you aren’t in a relationship you will feel so alone and that would be devastating.

 Learn to be Independent before becoming dependent

I wish people knew that there is so much more to life than finding someone to love. Like I know people who use social media like Instagram as a dating up, it’s a new girl/boy every month. Please stop. Every time you give out your love but don’t get it back to the ounce you do, you are giving away a piece of your heart. Then when you don’t get something in return, it leaves a hole. The more you give the more holes you’ll have. In order to stop this, learn to love yourself first. Before you go off in a search for someone to make you feel special, treat yourself first, make yourself feel special and learn your own worth.

Moreover at this age you should be creating an identity for yourself not becoming a part of someone else’s. When you enter a room do you want to be introduced as “his girlfriend or as her boyfriend?  Oh wait that wouldn’t happen as most relationships happen online and you guys haven’t even met in real life right? Do you only want to be known for being their partner?

Also I feel as if in order to experience real “love” you need to experience God. You need to know him and feel his love. His love that is so pure and raw. I have experienced his love and nothing compares to it not my mum’s, dad’s, brother’s, friend’s or any guy’s love, no ones. The greatest commandment from God is that “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.” Then comes “Love thy neighbour as yourself”. Look how first we need to love God then our neighbours but as yourself. So ask yourself this question, how can I love someone else if I don’t love myself and God?

Don’t get me wrong I know a few people in long term-relationships who do stay loyal who do experience the love at this age but not everyone will get that. About 98% of us won’t. Why? As a wise friend of mine said…

Simply because we are all still changing in the sense that, if I start dating someone now they could be a complete different person next year.

So my advice? Don’t date till you are at least 18 kids and until you know God. Enjoy the single life while you can 😉

With love,

Broni  x


A.N Here I am once again writing you lot an essay while I should be revising *sighs* on the bright side I only have 2 more exams to go!

Read these xx



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